Holy Crap, we gotta start watching the news on the weekend! We got stuck in a Spongebob Squarepants marathon and the next thing we hear pigs are turning Mexicans into Zombies!!
So duct tape your windows and body orifices shut and enjoy some TV with the fam…before they eat your brains.
8- The Big Bang Theory, CBS … Kaley Cuoco is a bonermaker of the highest order and network execs have reduced her wardrobe on the show from graphic tees and tight pants to tiny bikinis and stick-on tattoos.
8:30- Reba, ION … That’s right, REBA m-f’er! See what the average middle class family is like at home when they’ve taken off the Klan hoods and capes…we’re just keeeeeeding! Don’t watch Reba.
9- Heroes, NBC … It’s the third season (and possibly series) finale. Heroes is like myspace…it was great 3 years ago but now we’ve moved on to newer better things.
9:30- Roommates, ABCfamily … Hot college kids BUT its on ABC family so it rides that cutesy line like 7th Heaven did.
10- CSI: Miami, CBS … Watch Horatio Caine ham it up big time on one of the most unrealistic cop shows ever made.
11- Little People, Big World, TLC … A family of midgets who own a pumpkin patch, I just want to hug these little sh1ts until they squeak!
basic cable show of the night
10PM- Ax Men, History Channel … Put down your iPhone and watch how REAL MEN work for a living. During commercials you can tweet about how toasty comfy it is under your snuggie.
latenight pick
1130PM- Noticieros Univision: Ultima Hora … Catch up on all the Swine Flu news from the source, and yes there will be hot chicks with big hooters.
midnight movie
1230AM- Mars Attacks!, TBS … Our favorite Jack Nicholson performance of the last ten years, plus we fantasize about Sarah Jessica Parker’s head on a chihuahua.
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