We hope there is a large secret fetish community for this sort of thing. We love to get hits from weirdos! We’re going to pepper this post with search terms that will help sexually depraved googlers reach us: “Carrot Mouth Orgy”, “Glenn Close Baby Carrot Gang Bang”, “Jimmy Fallon Orange Nubbin Choke Porn”, “Gagging Glen Close Veggie Sex Suckathon”, “I Wish I Was A Baby Carrot And Lived With Several Friends In Between Glenn Close’s Cheek And Gums, That Would Be So Hot”.
For everyone who’s not masturbating right now, let’s discuss Late Night With Jimmy Fallon. Good band? The best. Funny? Not particularly. Unusual? Yes. Every time we watch Fallon we see something we haven’t seen before, from beer pong with Betty White to duets with Hank Jr. to workouts with Jessica Biel. It’s sort of like The Gong Show, but for celebrities. We mean that in a good way.
Do you love Glenn Close and carrots? You may also enjoy:
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