Not since Lindsay Lohan went to rehab has there been a news story more predictable than “Family Guy” creator Seth MacFarlane’s, revelation that Stewie Griffin is gay. While this may surprise someone who hasn’t seen the show, we saw it coming ever since we first saw Stewie in that cop uniform pictured above. In the spirit of obvious TV announcements, we’ve put together a list of 10 TV Announcements That Would Be Even Less Shocking Than Finding Out Stewie Is Gay.
10. Brian is an Alcoholic
Since they announced Stewie is gay, why not acknowledge Brian’s drinking problem? Then, after the surprise wears off, they can announce he’s also a dog.
9. Ryan Seacrest is Gay
Even though there are constant gay jokes on “Family Guy” about Stewie, Ryan is way more obvious.
8. “How I Met Your Mother” Will Never End
There have been around 15 seasons already and all we know about “the mother” is that her umbrella is yellow. In the year 2037, CBS will announce they were never planning on announcing who the mother would be.
7. Ross Had Feelings For Rachel
But did Rachel have feelings back? (spoiler: yes)
6. “Monk” Sucks Now
“Monk” is in its final season and Tony Shaloub will announce that he wants to end the show because they drove a great character into the ground by using the same jokes for eight seasons straight.
5. Dr. Foreman Is Black.
On “House,” they’ve been hinting at it in the later seasons and having a prominent black character would be a politically bold move.
4. “Deal Or No Deal” Is A Prank On The World
“We just had to do it,” admits an NBC executive. “We had to see how long we could get away with it.”
3. Comedy Central Is Now Somehow The Only Reliable News Network
This is shocking in itself, but not a surprise anymore.
2. “Futurama” Will Not Be As Good When It Comes Back
Don’t tell us to be optimistic. If we said it would be great when it came back, you’d tell us we were jinxing it.
1. TBS is NOT “Very Funny”
Sure, we’ll watch reruns of “Seinfeld” in the afternoon but “My Boys” is not the best show on TV we aren’t watching. Neither is “Tyler Perry’s House Of Anything.”
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